why do people have to be so mean.

myboyfriend: somecuntthathatesme: okay so we are all gonna tell u now                             if yoou bring that fat whore to our prom we will have both of u jumped all that bitch does is cause problems and if u were smart u would get rid of her so we r warning u in advance thanx bye

the one thing i was actually looking foward to, is ruined.

im not going to prom.

and anorexia is teasing me again.

the phones ringing again.

i wanna delete half the entrys ive written bc none of them feel like i do. i always change my thoughts. its never worth it. but there are a few things that always remain the same.

- i love my boyfriend.

- i love my family

- i miss my mother

- i hate my rapist.

anorexia calls me.she can leave a message, but ill try not to call back.

bullimia calls even more..ill try not to even answer.

...metaphors.

ignoring pisses me off to the highest extreme.

- - not gonna think about it. maybe later.

EDIT<3/

so apparently im not able to hang out with or be friends with them, but you are? yea i dont think so mister. your pissing me off. last night you even acted like her? wow fuck you.

im sry i cant write right now.

you know whats strange? i really do think sex is so dirty. but when im with him..it doesnt seem that way. it just feels right. even if he doesnt make it seem perfect. it doesnt matter. i like making him happy. and i like us.

i love you babe.<3

october is our month.8 is our number.2004 is our year.

 maybe tomorrow it will be a more interesting post...then again maybe it wont. depending what happens with my life.